Saturday, July 01, 2006

a few more informal notes, pursuing previous blogs

Dear Jens Lehmann,

... oh, forget it. Good show. Here's hoping the Italians distract your brains out.

Can I send you a bill for the paper hankies?


Dear Italy,

Good show! You had an easy time of it, I daresay, but from what I hear - I didn't stay up to watch the game - you actually played a fantastic attacking game. I did get to the news early this morning, though, and saw all the cheering and the goals and Alessandro del Piero kissing the rest of you in inappropriate places*. I didn't realise how much I was depending on a victory from you to counter the heartbreak of the other game, but I was. Your undeniable superiority over Ukraine is all very well, but it's good to know that Luck and I back the same teams now and then. Molto grazie for the uplifting win, chaps. You have a tough one ahead of you, but nothing is impossible. Remember, on an average you're about a thousand times sexier than Germany. Invoke that awesome.


Dear Brazil and France,

get done with it already.


P.S. Portugal, if you're reading, I'm on your side.

Dear Bryan Singer,

Hi, I just got back from watching Superman Returns. I have to say, my knee-jerk reaction was: 'You gave up X3 for this?' However, there's no denying that you've made an interesting film, or at least a film as interesting as it gets when your protagonist is the Man of Steel, rather than a ragtag bunch of mutants of varying ages, sizes, sexes and emotional compositions.

I was waiting for this film eagerly, because I think your work rocks. Better and more eloquent critics than myself have said that you win at making tight, slick superhero films.

--- slight spoilers follow. Ridiculous, I know, giving you a spoiler warning in an epistle about your own film, but such is the nature of open letters. ---

So I want to know why Kevin Spacey as the cracktastic Lex Luthor seemed like he was a in a different film from the well-meaning, slightly cheesed-up one the rest of your characters were placed in. It reminded me of Johnny Depp in that modern classic, Pirates of the Caribbean, functioning on a whole different plane of energy and sass. I mean, come on. Kate Bosworth and Kevin Spacey in the same film? Who were you kidding?

Your grasp on the technical aspects of the film, the play of light and sound, on the fact, most of all, that superhero films are practically required to be dazzling, lovingly-crafted firework displays, has only grown stronger. Full marks on that. I notice, however, that you treat emotion the way your source comic-books treat science, freeing it from accuracy and complexity on the condition that it makes a big bang when set off. I know you didn't have much to work with in the first place, and believe me, I'm almost pathetically grateful that, far from caricaturing or pratronising the character of Lois, you made her the central character. I realise that filmmaking takes a lifetime of learning. So maybe subtlety and ambivalence can wait a year or two, eh.

Speaking of subtlety, though. That Christ metaphor? I might have missed it entirely. If you hadn't slammed it all over the screen like PIE. I didn't mind the hanging in the air, father-and-son thing all that much, but the crawling. Oh god, the crawling over the kryptonite-infused rock island. I don't know if my gut wrenched in sympathy or annoyance.

Apart from that, loved your Daily Planet, your Jimmy Olsen, your Clark Kent was adorable, Lois' boyfriend Scott Sum- erm, Richard. Richard! was really cool. And yes, I'd totally watch it again.

Here's hoping this film earns you much wealth and sexual favours,

Your fan,

*What? It IS inappropriate to PDA in front of an audience of thousands in most countries in the world!


  1. Nein, didn't like Superman. Kevin Spacey did look like he had been asked to reprise his role as Kaiser Jose. "Billions will die" that was so flat a dialogue. Maybe I'm used to superheroes with issues not the ones who have a portfolio shot ready for the papers.

  2. Nah, come on, it was totally decent considering it was about SUPERMAN. And yes, so this is not Kevin Spacey's attempt at a second Oscar. But the world needs more of him as a rule.

  3. Sigh! I went and watched the movie with my friends and we had exactly pretty much the same reaction as Kyle and Stan after they watched "Passion of the Jew". BOOOOOORING...want our money back :D (even after watching the movie with free tickets that we had)

  4. The tragedy is that both Superman and X3 sucked. The good news is that POTC Dead Man's Chest rocks. And as for Italy - I am all for the Azzuri but let's not kid ourselves. They got thru this tournament against easy teams and one last minute goal of a dodgy penalty. I reckon it will be a Franco-German final with Germany winning. A bad result for England but a good result for the German economy, yay!

  5. Am sure today's match would have definitely made you happy :) Amazing goal by Piero. The score should really have been 4-0

  6. golaxx: you BET i'm happy. :D :D :D