Monday, March 13, 2006

mocking the beautiful; other flotsam.

Being exempted from common human compassion on Mondays, I feel the need to perpetuate the following link: David Beckham awed by six-year-old son's math. homework.

It's totally done differently to what I was teached when I was at school, and you know I was like 'Oh my God, I can't do this'."

Oh, wait. He plays football too, dunnee? Well, never mind, to paraphrase Leonard Cohen. We are ugly, but the two times table is not beyond us.

The weekend was engaged in the pursuit of beautiful artistes, all of them British and spiffing, but lazy. I refer of course to luminous prodigy and my new role model Zadie Smith, who is clever but clearly not too stressed by the need to transcend brilliance, make us think radically new things, fulfil promise, etc. This is sad as she is pactically aflame with potential. (But unlike the Romantics, I do happen to believe there are worse things in the world than unfulfilled potential.)

Additionally, I have joined the ranks of those who have seen a little production called "Love Actually" (or loveactually per the opening credits), which is almost as full of respectable and sexy thespians as the bloody Harry Potter franchise. Of course, Harry Potter does not contain Rowan Atkinson, but in its favour, Liam Neeson is an ultimately poor if charming sub for Ralphiemort.

Hugh Grant, the Prime Minister of Britain, making disco w/ self, as his govt. has never sent people to die in needless wars or lied to the electorate.

Love Actually, quite like Harry Potter, come to think of it, is a shameless bid to satisfy the world's Anglophilia, in itself a not-blemishless affection given colonial past, carb-rich stodgy food, etc. Like Harry Potter, it satisfies the belief of the Americanised global citizen that s/he is a misunderstood, unique and quirky individual who would indulge in smoking and swearing and free love and dry wit, given half a chance, (alright, so maybe not entirely Harry Potter) and further allows for the possibility of such a society actually existing. I, of course, am a firm believer in this fantasy and will be taking a holiday to the British Isles as soon as socioeconomically feasible.

I would say more about the further similarity of HP and LA in that they consistently marginalise or ignore love-actuallys that exist in the form of interracial and LGBT relationships, but it would kill the mood. Besides, everyone knows that Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter are secretly obsessed with each other.

Lastly, I effectively destroyed any delusion I entertained of intellectual cred when I fell about weeping listening to the Beatles at one a.m. last night, but I'm not stressed about that either. It's a visceral thing. If Zadie can be cool, I can be cool.


  1. All You Need Is Love, of course. Brought on by the film. Then I went on to the eleven-song suite on Abbey Road, Hey Jude, Penny Lane, and Beautiful Boy (Darling Boy) solo from John's last album where he ends saying 'Good night Sean, see you in the morning,' after which of course he was shot to death. God, I love the Beatles.

  2. (grin)

    You just might like I am Sam then. Only, it has all covers.

  3. Hey! new to your blog.. I liked the movie love actually it was decent and soooo loved that all you need is love cover! But the movie is actually pretty old rite...?

  4. @ prateek: I haven't seen the film, but I do like some of the covers - the Wallflowers, and Aimee Mann, to name two. :)

    @ xFreakx: As far as I'm aware the film came out in 2003. Is that too old? Not all that old? Old enough? In my opinion it belongs in the 'been around for a while' category.

  5. If you want another similarity, both Harry Potter and Love Actually have the fabulous and extremely attractive, in my biased opinion, Alan Rickman.

    Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy, definitely obsessed with each other!

    On an completely unrelated note, apparently David Beckham didn't even graduate from high school.

  6. @ panacea: I'm so glad you brought up Alan Rickman! I did not as words consistently fail me when it comes to him. Well, except for 'yum'.

  7. @panacea. Why is Beckham not graduating surprising? Most footballers join youth training at 15. Kinda like Indian cricketers playing at 17. Almost by definition, the best will quit school early.

  8. Bina: When you say 'best', don't you actually mean the prettiest? :D